The beautiful world of K-POP

I goddamn love Korean pop music, guys. Boy bands, girl bands, I don’t discriminate. They are all flawless.

However, today, we will focus on boy bands, because they destroy me. And they will destroy you, too. And Korea knows how to do boy bands, and honestly, the US is just not on their level. Britain is getting closer, I mean they brought us the perfection that is 1D, so that’s an A+ forever. The US however, who have they brought us? These fools (bless their hearts), and whatever is going on here (holster that, JT).

I digress. Reasons I love Korean boy bands (I’ve gone full Buzzfeed here):

  1. They have taken American culture and made it into something confusing and wonderful.

    Howdy.
    Howdy.
  2. They do exceedingly strange things with their hair and manage to still look great.

    This guy is howling.
  3. They are so sensitive. I mean, look at this fellow in his cute little bird sweater cuddling a tiny puppy. Also, FYI, in this music video, he goes to give this tiny puppy to his woman, only to find that she is with another man. Is your heart broken yet? Watch the video in all its glory while crying yourself to sleep here.

    Cuddle me like you’re cuddling that puppy.
  4. They like to dance around in slightly damaged suits and sneakers while expressing their masculinity through dance. Also they’re really good dancers.

    BACK UP
  5. Did you think all they did was dance and sing? You’re wrong. They rap at your face like they own you. They also wear flat-rim caps while rapping at you face. Also you feel like what they’re saying is aggressive and/or sexual but you’re not at all sure because you don’t speak Korean.

    Pardon?
  6. THEY KNOW THAT THEY OWN YOU. LOOK AT THIS GUY. He definitely knows his face was constructed according to the golden ratio.

    Someone bring me some cool water to splash on my face.
    Someone bring me some cool water to splash on my face.
  7. What did I say about their dancing skills? This dance move is extremely advanced and only for experienced boy band-ers. I call it the “electric mixer in your pocket”.

    Jiggle jiggle jiggle jiggle
    Jiggle jiggle jiggle jiggle
  8. In the world of k-pop, not only is it normal to wear clothing made of glitter, it’s encouraged. This guy definitely knows how to work a glitter shirt (and a crowd).

    Lord help us.
    Lord help us.
  9. Members of Korean boy bands are team players. They know that sometimes, you gotta let one guy sing while you hang back and sway your arms in support and/or glare at the audience while slow clapping à la Mr. Studded Blazer in the middle there.

    Good work, team.
    Good work, team.

So, in conclusion, go watch k-pop music videos for they rest of your life. It’ll make you feel like this: 

Here are some links to get you started on your journey:

God bless Korea.

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